I’m very sorry to disappoint all of you out there, that were considering purchasing sessions at the Honeyfield Mud Spa for Christmas presents, but the service has had to be withdrawn due to climate issues beyond my control.
I am really sorry that this is such short notice but whilst poo-hoovering the paddocks this morning I noticed that my boots and the wheels of my hoover were clean. Where had all the mud gone?
It has been replaced with giant pools of water, scuppering all my plans for the mud spa. Mud is just no good if it doesn’t stick. I’d even planned the advertising for the New Year offering special rate detoxing mud sessions. This I thought would be good for all those of you that had eaten too much Christmas dinner and mince pies etc…
Though I’ll let you into a little secret, my ulterior motive was to remove any last traces of mud here we still had in stock :0))
Any ways, not to be thwarted in my diversifying attempts, new plans have been hastily arranged. I say hastily but I have invested at least five minutes of my time on the internet doing the proper research.
New uniforms for the farms happy helpers needed to be sourced and so after extensive googling, I just love that search button! I have purchased these outfits for my parents to make them feel part of the team and keep them happy in their work. Very important having happy helpers and it really isn’t abusing the elderly, see their smiling :0))
By now I’m sure you have guessed our new enterprise, so I will just confirm for those of you who’ve already started on the Christmas sherry. The paddocks have turned into paddy fields so we are now planting rice.
Rice will come in handy to make curry, you know with all the leftover turkey after Christmas. You see proper planning prevents piss poor performance, just had to get that line in, its Neil’s favourite saying :0))
Needless to say if any of you need rice, looking out at my paddocks and all the water they contain we will have plenty going spare especially as I hate curry,:0))
Weather do your worst I’m still smiling!